Life: A Reflection of Perception

Life is a funny thing. A chaotic and messy and blessed thing.

For the past 2 1/2 years I have been so caught up in the intricacies of life that I forgot how much I value the written word. Through writing, I am able to make sense of all the nonsense floating around in my mind. Putting my thoughts onto paper (or screen) makes them real. I've missed that. 

Teaching in Thailand pushed me far outside my comfort zone. I didn't realize I had so much growing up to do, but I was changed in a way that I never thought possible. In a similar, but very different way, this semester has dropped me to the breaking point I didn't know I had. Moving forward in light of such darkness is a conscious effort, and, more often than not, I find myself getting caught up in all the negative aspects of any given situation. Without fully realizing it, I end up losing sight of the good things in my life. That ends now.

Last week I had to facilitate a 3 hour discussion in my Industrial Organizational Psychology course. Naturally, that was the day I had been dreading all semester. 20 minute presentations are bad enough, but 3 hours?! Heck, I can drive to PG in 3 hours! Talk about perspective :P I was so focused on the seemingly endless challenge and the the possibility of failure that I had a hard time even acknowledging the potential for success. I knew the chapter I was to teach forwards and backwards, but confidence was hard to find. It wasn't until after I had survived the dreaded day that I recognized how far I've come.

A few months ago, life suddenly became crazier than ever. In spite of that, Chelsea and I turned a simple class project into a published, peer reviewed article in SUU's academic journal. I came up with and started working on my undergraduate thesis - you know, the one I don't have to do to graduate, but feel oddly compelled to do anyway. I successfully led a 3 hour discussion.

I've always been good at school, but it wasn't until a few days ago that I figured out why. School pushes me to do and become better. Daunting tasks that seem impossible slowly become a reality as, day by day, I take small steps that propel me ever-forward, toward my potential.
Graduation is right around the corner and, honestly, that scares me. A lot. That's the thing about life, though; it's messy and it's scary, but the challenges we face today prepare us for the person we need to be tomorrow. Growth is possible because of our challenges. Because of the the occasional and sometimes lasting bad, the good parts of life can be sweeter, more meaningful.
Life can be messy, but ultimately it is our choices that dictate how the situation will play out. I firmly believe that with the right attitude, any situation can become an opportunity for growth and enlightenment.
Life is a reflection of perception.

Soaking Life In :)

It's only been 2 months since I last wrote. I guess that in and of itself is the epitome of working while going to school :)

At the beginning of the semester my roommate Kaila and I hiked Kanarraville Falls for FHE as a combined activity. It was our ward (the 20th) and the 14th ward. Now, as it is I didn't know many people in my ward, and there was no way I knew anyone in the 14th... except I did. While hiking I ran into Leslie, a friend from dad's ward. What are the chances, right?? That was fun.

Fast forward a few weeks...

I finally convinced Chels to go climb a random mountain with me.

Surprisingly, it only took about an hour to get to the top, but ah, it was the highlight of my entire week. The view was amazing and afterwards I was only sore for, like, 4 days, haha :P

Next, I got to take Vlad to Fear class.

Remember show and tell back in elementary school? Yeah, it was like that, except I didn't hate it; I loved it :D

Oh, and then I got to sit in the window during class a few times. That was pretty cool. It made it kinda hard to contribute to the class from up there... but it was fun nonetheless :)

..That's only about 10 feet higher than everyone else..

Speaking of Fear. Yesterday our professors took our entire class (about 15 students) and locked us in a dark closet about 8' by 4'... That sounds big, but most of it was full of library storage.

Why would they do that to us??

Well, besides the obvious (it's a fear class), they were trying to demonstrate being locked behind a mirror, like we read in Coraline. It got extremely hot super fast, but besides that it was kinda fun :)

My newspaper job is going pretty well. I've written more stories than I can count, a few of which have been front-page worthy! Honestly though, I'm just ready to be done. 3 more issues before the end of the semester! Hallelujah!

And for the best news of all. You ready for it?

I'm going to Thailand on a volunteer abroad through ILP to teach young students English. That's right. I leave in January. I am so psyched for this. Sure I've traveled before, but never on my own and never longer than 2 weeks. But I'll be living in Thailand for 4 months! Crazy, right?

See, a lot of my friends are either already on their missions or will be leaving soon and I just kept having this feeling that I needed to do something more with my life while I'm still young. A mission did cross my mind... but no, that's not for me. But then I went to an International Language Programs meeting (they bribed students by paying them to come. Heck yeah I went!) and by the end of the day my application was sent in. Everything else just seemed to fall perfectly into place after that. But wanna know the best part? It feels right. I'm scared to leave the US for that long and teach kids (if any of you know me then you know patience isn't my strong suit), but at the same time I want to be spontaneous for once. I want to play with tigers and elephants and do something I wouldn't normally consider. Plus, if I can make a difference in even one person's life while I'm there, then all the better.

I've traveled, and I know what traveling does to me. It makes me rethink my life and my priorities, helps me find the deeper meaning behind things, and ultimately, I become more grateful for what I have. Last time I traveled was... wow.. only 3 months ago. But hey, who says there's such a thing as too much gratitude and experience??

This is my time, and I'm going to do my darndest to make the most out of it!

On a completely unrelated note, Vlad's still alive and I haven't been kicked out of my apartment yet :D

Life's Adventure

The past month has been one full of memories, bidding farewell, and saying hello.

After our Mexico trip Mom and I headed in the opposite direction: Canada.

We had a blast :) An eventful road-trip full of fur, stashing contraband, and hitting foxes was only the beginning. We surprised not only Taeta, but the Shipley cousins and the Kawas family. It was so good to see them all :D

And yes, Taeta has dead things in her house now :P

Kooper didn't like that at all.

  

Canada in a nutshell :D

This past month has seen 2 of my good friends off on missions. One to Minnesota, the other to the Mexico MTC to further prepare for El Salvador. I look up to these friends more than they will ever know. They're going to do amazing, I know it.

** I'm published!! I made my high school portion of this blog into a book. It's amazing! Thanks for your complete support an encouragement, Mom :D**

School started a week ago.

Haha, I can honestly say I never thought I'd enjoy school (especially living at school!!)... but I actually really love everything about it. I forgot just how much I loved Cedar until I came back. Call me crazy, but when I walked on campus that first day of job training I felt like I was home.

So far it's been pretty hectic. I'm pulling 16 credits this semester...

Intro to Criminal Justice

Psychology as a Science and Profession

Stress and Pain

Fear (Honors)

Institute

Criminal Investigations

Oh yeah, I declared myself as a double major in Criminal Justice and Psychology :D

Plus, I also have a job!!

I'm a reporter for the University Journal :)

I actually really enjoy getting to know people and staying busy all the time. And it doesn't hurt that my editors keep complimenting my writing style :) A few of my stories have already been front-page worthy!! I'm psyched! 

There are some days when I am completely stressed and overwhelmed with upcoming story deadlines... but then an editor will praise my writing and in that moment the pressure fades and I feel like I've conquered the world :D

*If you're interested you can check out our paper at suunews.com*

School is stress, yes. But it's also one of the best times to learn who you are and who you want to become. It's a huge step in life and I am doing all I can to take advantage of every single moment. I hope that one day I can look back at this time and be proud of all that I was able to accomplish. I want to learn.. but I also want to have fun. Lots and lots of fun. 

Here's to another school year, one filled with friends, both old and new, and more memories than I know what to do with :D

Chapters

First off, Mexico was amazing!

   

 

We flew to Phoenix, picked up our rental car (yes, that's a Ford Mustang convertible!), then drove across the Mexican border (ridiculously easy I might add, at the border the Mexicans just waved us through...) to Puerto Penasco. Fresh coconut. Fresh mango. Shells galore. Top notch food. Restaurants with a view. Quality time with mom. It was so much fun :D

On a different note, one of my best friends just left on her mission.

14 months ago Nicole and I went to a carnival. Despite having multiple classes together in high school, that was the first time we hung out. After that.. we became close. She attended BYU and I was living down in Cedar City going to SUU. However, distance didn't matter. Somehow we were both able to open up to each other in a record amount of time. We shared our highs and our lows, our triumphs and our struggles. When there was no one else, we had each other. And while I can't speak for her, it felt good to have a friend who I knew I could count on. No matter what.

Going on a mission is no small choice, and I commend Nicole for being able to make this one. It wasn't easy. But I know without a doubt that she will make a great missionary.

Running Free.

Running away from your problems doesn’t solve anything. We’ve all heard this simple truth, but sometimes things go bad. After all, life is a test full of twists and snags. The Lion King's Timon and Pumbaa teach that the good life is one in which there are ‘no rules, no responsibilities and best of all, no worries.’ While this proved right in Simba’s life for many years.. eventually the consequences of his actions caught up with him, as they inevitably will.
I don’t believe that we are defined by the moments and situations around us, but rather how we handle them. Do we crumble under the pressure or smile through the pain? When everything turns upside down and backwards it can be really hard to look up and find your balance. But you know what I’ve found? Dwelling on all the bad isn’t worth it. Nothing good comes from dwelling. Here’s a Pintrest quote for you: “Your bad attitude is like a flat tire: You can’t go anywhere unless you change it.”

We aren’t given challenges that we can’t manage. The fact of the matter is that our challenges are meant to strengthen us. With this in mind how can we *not* look to the Lord and know that in the end everything will be alright?? Keep your chin up and seek out the good in everything. It’ll make even the bleakest of times seem.. well.. not so bleak :)

Following the same train of thought,
“Isn’t it funny? The things we don’t do that are right in front of us?” –Julie
How can we live life to the fullest if we aren’t actually living?? Here's to putting some trust in the life we've been given and making the best out of bad situations.

Living Life

Living Life.. It's true that life changes, but you know what I've found? It only gets better.

Ha, you want to know what else I've learned?

It's better to enjoy life. Enjoy the moment and think not of the future, because if you think of what's coming, you don't give thought as to what's happening.

Enjoy the moment before it becomes a memory. It's easier to be happy:)

Weekend Away

Yesterday I came to 2 very important realizations.

1) I haven't been sick this past school year. At all. Do you know how awesome that is? I can't remember the last time I went a full school year without getting sick. *knock on wood* Watch me get sick this week for finals :/

2) Once I get an idea in my head there's no stopping me. Looking back, I notice this a lot. If either Chels or I even mention the word 'Subway' then it's as good as a done deal. Also, many of my spontaneous drives home have been due to a simple spoken word. Actually... just about all of them. Off the top of my head I can think of 3 instances:
~ That time Chels went home and, after a word from a friend, I made a separate trip up.
~ Spontaneous trip to and from Nevada in one night.
~ Ditching Cedar the weekend before finals (*cough* right now)
Those are just the examples I can think of right now... which is pretty impressive considering how late it is.

I keep typing out half sentences, but then deciding it doesn't make sense and deleting it. I think that means it's bedtime... Night!